The Truth

i’ve dug myself a hole. i’m the boy who cried wolf. In desperation we all find ways of making extreme measures seem rational. turn fantasy into reality, whether it’s to protect us from the truth, or destroy ourselves by turning that truth into a fiction we can’t help but fear. This past year has been a hibernation of the man i am. it was blessed with a beautiful friend i will never forget. Someone who let the real me stand up, feel the sun, feel alive, even for just moments. But she could not fully wake the hiding soldier, still crutched by a war that ended years ago. Today i stand with words that can’t be believed, nor should they. Today i stand without my beautiful friend with a truth that will forever go unheard. But today I am awake, alive, fueled, and found. Today I am the person she knew i could be and was. Today I have it all together, the confidence, the rationality, the drive to lift us up and feel the heat of the stars. But I am all this today. And she is yesterday. So i will bow my head and journey alone, hoping this person gets a chance to see her face tomorrow.